I take 12mg of warfarin a day at 10pm. This is to make up for the lack of Protein S in my blood. Protein S is one of many proteins that regulates Vitamin K in the blood. Vitamin K causes the blood to clot (coagulate).
Due to my deficiency of Protein S my blood has a tendency to clot in a dangerous way leading to deep vein thrombosis (a blood clot) and/or pulmonary embolism (one of the symptoms of “pulmonary embolism” is “sudden death”). So, I take warfarin, an anti-coagulation drug (it is also used as rat poison), to prevent these things from happening.
Last week I wrote about how I had noticed that I was grinding my teeth as a result of getting “lost in my head.” I pointed to that as a reminder that I am a psychosomatic unity. My mind was affecting my body.
I believe I have another example to illustrate that I am a psychosomatic unity (as we all are).
Last Thursday night I ran out of my medicine. I have not taken my medicine in several days. I have repeatedly called my doctor and been assured that a new prescription would be called in right away. They have had three business days and repeated calls from me, yet it has not been called in. If it doesn’t happen in the morning I am going to drive to the clinic and walk right past the authorized access door to the office of my doctor and ask him where my prescription is.
Now, I cannot say that how I have been feeling is definitively connected to what is going on in my body as a result of not having my medicine, but there are a couple of things that I can say. One, I have had terrible headaches. Two, I have been extremely impatient and irritable. Three, it has been difficult to think – even about simple things like phone numbers and where I set my pen.
For instance today I snapped at one friend in anger and I lost control of my ability to hold back tears with another. I could hardly focus at work and found myself to be very irritated and frustrated as I went about my day. In class I argued with my professor about something that was not very important. Then, on the ride home I got really mad at God about the pain I am experiencing. I just want my medicine. Why has it felt like He has been working against me?
The point I am trying to make is that I find it fascinating the way my body can affect my mind, will, and emotions. If I am not feeling well it causes me to lash out at others (which is a lack of love and self-control = sin) and to fight with God.
The Cappadocians say, “That which He did not assume He cannot redeem.”
I thank God that He is redeeming the whole of who I am. He is not just saving my soul. He has promised to deliver my whole being. Until then, however, I am going to have to grow more and more in conformity to Christ. A part of that is going to be a control that does not allow physical pain to cause me to stumble in holiness and faith.
God-Man save me!
NYC September 2017 🏙
1 week ago